There’s hundreds of women sex bloggers who never get a lick of attention for what they do. They don’t show their faces, maybe. They don’t publish comments, or an email address. They don’t ask for links from anyone “important.” They aren’t writing to grow a fanbase; they’re writing for the sake of it, even if the writing might not be very good.

Sex writing — confessional sex writing, as it’s never blogging about sex outside the personal that gets this treatment — isn’t always a performance, a “stupid” woman’s route to Quick Riches and Fame. It’s about writing in public, period. It’s writing for an immediate audience. And how dare they. How dare a woman want to be on the public stage.

You can’t “use” sex to get anywhere if an audience isn’t already out there waiting for you to arrive.